what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
