You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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