Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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