I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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