i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
So squirting runs in the family.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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