none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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