Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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