yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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