They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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