I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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