Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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