You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Randomize