he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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