question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
