So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize