we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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