69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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