why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
