so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
