yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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