Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
