I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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