i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
