I'm laying in your front yard are you home
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
