three words: i give head
three words: not that well
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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