So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
