I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Randomize
