id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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