i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
