Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
