Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
You are the jesus of drinking
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
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