Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize