They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
