I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize