he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
operation have a gay friend backfired
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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