Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
He did a backflip because drugs
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
