we're blogging at a bar
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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