this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I don't think brook has ever known best
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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