dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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