dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize