Grow some girl-balls and come out already
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
