yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
