i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
My dick has a subreddit
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
