Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
