Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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