my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
We have so much sex to catch up on
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
