dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
as a side note pls kill me
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
