one might say we're banned from that church
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize