I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
You ruined the universe
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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