Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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