Where did you get a picture of my penis
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
it glows. i had to have it.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
