we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
