you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
